Get Real part 3:
Real Life
by
John Young
Sunrise Wesleyan Church
October 8, 2006
Introduction
Is it just me, or do
some of you also have issues with the theology in a number of our hymns?
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"He keeps me singing
every day"
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"Ever day with Jesus
is sweeter than the day before"
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"And now I am happy
all the day"
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"I've discovered the
way of gladness"
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"I've found
happiness all the time, wonderful peace of mind, since I found the Lord"
My issue with these
songs is that they don't seem to address the reality of life. It may be
that their authors were happy all the day long, but probably not for
more than a couple of weeks at a stretch.
Dr. James Dobson observed that we rarely get a period of more than two
weeks of smooth sailing at a time before some upsetting circumstance
intersects our life.
So, today, I want to talk to you about real life…life without a feigned
smile; life where the rubber hits the road; life where unpleasantness
can't be simply wished away; life where disease, pain, and loss are our
genuine bedfellows; life that is deep, not shallow, not superficial,
not phony.
Now, the thing about sharing a message like this is that even if no one
needs to hear it today, some of you will need it in the near future,
and many of you have been down this road already.
Any adequate theology must be able to incorporate the reality of pain,
loss, and suffering. If our understanding of God demands that He
deliver us from these and keep us happy all the day, then we will be
confounded, confused, and disappointed in God when the inevitable
experiences of pain overtake us.
Christian singer/songwriter, Wayne Watson, has a song titled "Every Now
and Again". The thrust of this song is that it's good to be lonely, or
to go down in defeat, or to know sorrow every now and again if it draws
us closer to God.
"It's good to know sorrow, to be closely
acquainted with grief,
To be showered with tears, no reason to cheer,
To find in Christ your only relief.
"And know I am grateful,
'Cause if it makes me love you a little bit more,
I know, I'm sure,
It's good to know sorrow every now and again."
A healthy theology will see God as neither indifferent to our pain nor
inadequate to deal constructively with it. God's grace is designed for
fallen people in a fallen world. His grace is able to deal with reality.
Thoughts on Suffering
Suffering in our life
stems from three root causes:
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Our
sinfulness: Our rebellion against the will of God always
produces pain. This is God's design. He knows that living outside His
will is damaging and that is why He warns us and pleads with us against
sin. Also, in the economy of God, the resulting pain and suffering is a
tool that God uses to shepherd us back to Himself.
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Poor
choices: Being human means that we make a lot of wrong
choices. Not necessarily sinful choices, just poor ones…eating too much
and exercising too little, not being careful with our finances,
trusting the wrong people and not trusting the right ones, or not
nurturing important relationships. Poor choices also have consequences,
sometimes cumulative, sometimes far reaching, sometimes dormant for
years.
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The
fallenness and brokenness of this world: Bad things happen
to innocent people through the sinfulness of others or the ravages of
time and nature. The bystander who is shot in a gang war crossfire; a
faithful wife whose spouse walks out on her for another woman; little
children who are abused; the discovery that you have cancer; the loss
of property to fire, flood, or storm; a car wreck; or emotional
collapse. All of these can cause intense suffering for completely
innocent people who did not participate in causing the pain at all.
Suffering can cause responses ranging from feelings of guilt or anger,
to rebellion, despair, hopelessness, and doubt. Just read the psalms to
find the whole array of human responses to suffering. God understands
the effects of suffering. That is one reason He inspired the psalmists
and other Biblical figures to share their suffering with us… that we
might know He is indeed acquainted with grief.
God sees pain differently than we tend to see it. He sees it from the
perspective of Romans 8:28: "And we know that all things work together
for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according
to His purpose."; and II Corinthians 12:9: "My grace is sufficient for
you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness."
Some of you have endured the loss of a loved one; others have had
protracted illness and coped with physical pain; some have been living
with the consequences of their former rebellion…thoroughly forgiven,
but still paying an earthly price for it; some have been deeply wounded
by the unfaithfulness of a friend or the deliberate and sinful actions
of someone who wanted to hurt you.
Personal Story
For me, emotional pain
came through a protracted clinical depression. I want to share with you
a little of my journey, its blackness, and the things I have learned
about myself and God in the process. This is very intense and personal.
One of the best ways to express my pain and struggle has been through
writing. I will be sharing a few short poems and paragraphs that I have
written over the years which have held great meaning for me.
If I were standing before a large crowd today bringing this message and
the Holy Spirit was powerfully present so that people were moved to
respond in great numbers and eternal fruit was being born in their
lives; if I truly felt the anointing touch of God and knew that He was
mightily using me; if the awesome works of God were accomplished in our
midst, then from an earthly perspective I would be tempted to say,
"This is my finest hour."
However, from heaven’s perspective I somehow think that my finest hour
might not have been so glorious in earthly terms. Permit me to share my
story personally with you. I began seeking the Lord with all my heart
and praying this prayer of irrevocable commitment sometime in 1993:
“Father, lest I misunderstand my motives and deceive myself in pledging
my commitment to You I ask You to take me at my word. Sovereign
Almighty God take me at the word of my lips: Do whatever You must do,
bar nothing, at whatever cost, to bring me to the place where I will
love You, where I will trust You, where I will obey You the way You
want me to, no matter what, only give me the Grace to be true. Here is
my life, the breath of my nostrils - it is Yours to take; here is my
health - it is Yours to take; here are all of my wealth and possessions
- they are Yours to take; here is my job, my security - it is Yours to
take; here are all the relationships of my life - they are Yours to
take; here is my reputation - it is Yours to take. Almighty God I know,
should You ask any of these of me, that in my own strength I would fail
You on my very first step. Oh God, my hope, my only hope is that if You
ask any of these of me You will give me the grace to obey and yield
willingly what You ask. I do not present a perfectly prepared sacrifice
to You. This sacrifice of myself is rough and imperfect but it is all I
can bring. My hope is not in the strength of my commitment to You, my
hope is in the strength of Your commitment to me. Sovereign God, Here
is Your servant John. Do what You will. I irrevocably present the
totality of my life to You. I am in Your hands alone.”
Shortly afterwards began what were to be the blackest days of my
existence - a several-year experience of severe emotional pain and
suffering. I was swept off my feet by a deep depression, a black hole
of hopelessness and despair. I spent over a year on sick leave from my
job. God was nowhere to be found. In fact I went through periods where
I was completely uncertain whether God even existed.
During that time, I went to stay with godly friends, a Wesleyan pastor
and his wife, who took care of me. They lived in a small town. Often I
would take long walks on the back streets of that town trying to sort
out my thoughts. Before the depression I had asked God to do whatever
He needed to bring me to where He wanted me to be, at whatever cost,
asking only that He would give me the grace to be true. It occurred to
me during my pain that God just might be answering my prayer. On many
of my wanderings through the town's back streets I would wrestle one
moment with whether God even existed, and in the next moment I would
pray, ‘God, if this is what it takes for You to get Your will done in
me, then don’t stop. Don’t pull back. I must have Your perfect will for
my life.’ You see, even in the pits of my hopelessness and despair, God
really was answering my prayer. He was doing what had to be done in my
life and He was giving me the grace to be true. I somehow feel that
those back-street times of helpless painful submission to God’s
completely unknown plans will be revealed in eternity to have been
among my truly finest hours.”
I've been to the wall: perhaps you too have run into a wall of pain and
there is no way around it, or over it, or through it, and you are left
banging your head against the wall, trapped and alone.
The Wall
I've been to the wall for the thousandth time;
I've battered and bloodied my brow.
I've cried to the God of heaven to rend
These shackles and rescue me now.
I've watched as my dreams were ravaged by life,
I've faltered and stumbled in pain.
But God has been strangely silent and still,
So I'm back at the wall again.
With nowhere to turn and nowhere to go,
So empty and barren, forlorn,
I weep the dry tears of a shattered soul
And wish I had never been born.
Out of such bleakness has begun to grow a deepening understanding of
God's very personal love for me and His presence in my life through all
of my days, through all of my years, and through all of my pain.
Comforting Truths
Let me share with you
some of the comforting truths that have encouraged me along the way. I
am glad to share these with you because I also need to be reminded of
them frequently.
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God is
present and at work in your life.
Before time began, God knew you and loved you. He masterfully arranged
the circumstances of life to choose you, your hair, your eyes, your
skill, your strengths. He was there when you were conceived and all of
these came together. He watched you grow in the womb, saw your body and
soul form. You are His creation, and He looks on you with delight. He
shouted His love for you to all creation when He offered up His Son on
the cross. That was His eternal “I love you”.
If you are suffering, whether from personal sin, from poor choices, or
the presence of evil in this world, I want to emphasize that you are
not alone.
Listen to the words of the hymn by Mosie Lister, "Where No One Stands
Alone"
Once I stood in the night with my head
bowed low,
In the darkness as black as could be;
And my heart felt alone, and I cried, "O Lord,
Don't hide your face from me."
Hold my hand all the way, ev'ry hour, ev'ry day,
From here to the great unknown.
Take my hand, let me stand
Where no one stands alone.
It helped me to write the following statement of faith. I revisit it
frequently and draw strength from it.
"I believe that God is good; that He is
present and powerfully at work in my life, despite what my
circumstances may seem to indicate. The presence of pain, doubt, fear,
loneliness, despair, and brokenness is part of the journey. I do not
know where God is taking me, but I know that it is good because He is
good.
Though He seems distant and unreachable, I know He hears the longing
cries of my heart for Him and that He is patiently leading me home. I
choose to let God be God and to rest in the security of knowing that He
is in control and that my destiny is guaranteed."
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Life is a
journey.
Hebrews 12:1 (NKJV) says"…let us run with endurance the race that is
set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our
faith." Life is a journey. The destination is important, but so is the
trip itself. The process of reaching heaven prepares us for heaven.
Each step along the way has value whether it is one of bliss or one of
pain. As such, suffering has meaning. It is part of the process of
change in our lives that God is designing and supervising. There are
lessons to be learned, relationships to be built, service to be
offered, and a faith to be finished. God knows that pain and suffering
form an integral part of this growth; that we generally will not move
closer to Him unless we experience suffering that drives us to His
arms. All of the journey counts.
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God can
redeem your suffering.
Jesus said, "In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good
cheer. I have overcome the world." (John 16:33). God does not cause or
create suffering but He redeems it by appropriating it and using it for
good in our lives.
God, in His sovereignty and driven by perfect love, exercises His
infinite wisdom and His almighty power to take our suffering and pain,
even that which our sin has caused, and crown it with victory and
meaning. He will work ALL things together for our good if we are among
those who love Him and are His called children (Romans 8:28). God is
wise enough to not be surprised by our failures and big enough to bring
all of the circumstances of our lives under His authority. He is there
before the evil or the suffering happens and He has designed a
trajectory for it that accomplishes His purposes in the lives of His
children. Remember the story of Joseph. What his brothers meant for
evil, God meant for good.
Christian author, Brennan Manning, writes, "'The tenderness and love of
God our Savior has dawned in our lives: He saved us not because of any
righteous deeds we had done but because of His mercy' (Titus 3:4 – 5
JB). We can embrace our whole life story in the knowledge that we have
been graced and made beautiful by the providence of our past history.
All the wrong turns in the past, the detours, mistakes, moral lapses,
everything that is irrevocably ugly or painful, melts and dissolves in
the warm glow of (God's) accepted tenderness."
Further, Brennan Manning asks if we hear the words of Jesus speaking to
our hearts, "Shalom, be at peace. I understand your fears, your
failures, your brokenness. I don't expect you to be perfect. I have
been there. All is well. You have my love. You don't have to pay for
it, and you can't deserve it. You only have to open and receive it. You
only have to say yes to my love – a love beyond anything you can
intellectualize or imagine."
Earlier this year, I wrote the following words of hope:
"Underneath are the everlasting arms"
(Deut 33:27)
"Deeper and wider than my need; stronger than my weakness; present and
active beyond my brokenness, doubt, fear, pain, and despair – the grace
of God is at work in my life and has been continually through my years.
God is healing me and setting me free. This is the day of grace. I
don't know why the journey has been so very long, but I believe this is
God's time.
Lord, I am willing. Demolish strongholds; transform my thinking from
bondage to freedom, from performance to grace, from fear to faith.
Life is short. I want to use the gifts God has given me in His service,
and I want to do so in freedom, grace, and faith."
If you will bow your knee to His lordship, God will redeem your
suffering and bring good out of it for you and Glory to His name. If
God is nowhere to be found, hang on. If there seems to be no reason to
continue, hang on. If the temptation is strong to abandon God and His
ways, hang on. If faith is only a memory and you don’t even know if God
is alive let alone watching over you, hang on. We don’t have to feel
faith, we just have to act it...hang on, hang on, hang on, and "After
you have suffered a while God Himself will restore you, make you
strong, firm and steadfast." (1Peter 5:10 NIV). God is our redeemer and
as such He will also redeem our most pressing and painful
circumstances. ‘My grace is sufficient for you: for My strength is made
perfect in weakness.’ (2Cor. 12:9).
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Even God's
silence is purposeful and loving.
Sometimes God seems distant and silent; sometimes we even question His
love and motives. 1John 1:5 declares that God is light and in Him is no
darkness at all…no wickedness, no evil, no duplicity, and no lack of
knowledge. He knows exactly what it means to be John Young living with
my measure of brokenness in a very broken world. He understands and He
cares. He knows my needs. He understands my confusion. He has seen
every sin and failure. He feels my pain and knows all about those
things I have missed in life and grieve for. He is familiar with every
raw edge of my soul and is aware of every shackle that binds me.
Though God may seem silent and even uncaring at times, He is slowly,
surely at work in your life. He is a good God. He has not put you on
the shelf while He deals with others. He loves you as much as He loves
anyone. All of His love is yours. That’s what Calvary was all about. He
has committed Himself to molding you into the image of Christ. God’s
interest and passion are directed towards you. He is the chief lover of
you. His is the heart that longs for you, that dreams for you, that
yearns for your well being. And the God who loves you like that is
working in your life through every defeat and every victory; through
each stumble and each stride; through each failure and each success. I
remember James Dobson quoting, “With God, even when nothing is
happening, something is happening.”
C. H. Spurgeon said, "God is too good to be unkind, He's too wise to be
confused, and if I cannot trace His hand, I can always trust His heart."
God has His hand and His call on your life. He is with you and at work
in you. Be assured of that.
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God is
bigger than you need Him to be.
The King James Version tells us that God is able to do exceeding
abundantly above all that we ask or think (Eph. 3:20). Not just more,
but exceedingly more. He has also stated that His grace is sufficient
for us and His strength is made perfect in our weakness (2Cor. 12:9).
This is not a promise, but a simple statement of fact. God is the
eternal God. You can't surprise Him with your failure, you can't
confound Him with your circumstances, and you can’t stump Him with your
problems. He has “Blessed us with ALL spiritual blessings” (Eph. 1:3).
There is nothing lacking which He has not already supplied. Wherever
you go, whatever your circumstances this side of heaven, God is bigger
than you need Him to be.
Conclusion
The following poem is my
personal declaration of faith. I wrote it shortly before I turned 50
years old, and have decided to make it the "bottom-line" statement of
my life as I move into my second half-century. It has been very
meaningful and grounding to me, especially in dark days, when its
simple affirmation of faith brings solace and comfort.
So Here I Stand
So, here I stand and hang my hope
On this and this alone,
That Christ has died and paid the price
To make me all His own.
No marshalled powers in earth or hell
Can pluck me from His grace.
Though bruised and battered, tossed and torn,
I yet shall see His face.
And on that face, love's richest smile
That puts to death my fears…
Sweet balm for all my brokenness,
Sweet end to all my tears.
In conclusion, I would
like to remind you that there is a real God who has real grace for real
life. He is present and at work in your life. Your life is a journey
and every step along the way is important. God can redeem all your
suffering and pain. Even God's silence is purposeful and loving. God is
bigger than you need Him to be.
He is calling you to His heart, pain or no pain, suffering or no
suffering, loss or no loss. It's you He wants.
God's Embrace
Draw near, draw near and come to Me.
Let not your fears withhold,
For I your Father want to be,
Nor cherish I your gold.
It's you I want and not your wealth;
It's you I will pursue.
No rest will I permit Myself
'Till I'm embracing you.
~ by John Young
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